This one is for everyone who has ever traveled in an auto in the city of
Unfortunately, I’ve had to frequently use the transport because my paranoid mum wont let me take the bike, and has been promising me a car for 3 yrs now. So why am I choosing now to rant? Because yesterdays experience was more than I can handle and there is nothing else I can do about it but blog rant.
So. Why don’t I begin.
I study at Anna Univ, so my days are’nt exactly ever filled with promise and one is shittier than the next. So when I get called a “poromboke nai” at the end of one of them, you understand why I snap.
I live in guindy, 7 minutes away from college. Its 25 rupees by auto but of course the assholes , most of the time, pick a random number between 50 and 200 and quote it with such confidence you’d almost believe it.
This last f*** says 30, to drop me off “next to the swimming pool”. I agree because its late and my day at college was shittier than usual. Of course, he ignores the last bit and screeches to a halt at the edge of the swimming pool, and asks me to run the rest of the way.
me: “fine then, since you dint drop me all the way, I’m paying you only 25”
him: “no.(murderous glare)”
sigh. why did I think for a moment he’d actually agree. So we argue, he uses some words I don’t understand, I sound like a broken record with my limited Tamil ,and at the end of it
“moonji-a paru! Pormboke nai!! Auto la eradha inimae!”
Chooth. The only reason I dint verbally abuse him back was because the road is really lonely and if ran me down, body identification would be difficult.
For all of you who are saying “why dint she just call the police on him or something”, I’ve tried that too. They’re worse than the auto drivers.
The guy I pulled that on, again, refused to go all the way and we had unfortunately paid him already. He refused to give us our money back so I tell him I’m not getting off till he pays me. I loudly note down his number and make to call the police –and since I’m blessed with f***s luck, my phone has to run out of battery just then. I make him stop, get my friend to sit in the auto and go to a phone booth to call them.
Just so everyone knows, my tamil is horrible – I use Malayalam and English words where I please. So anyway, I call the police.
Me: I’d like to lodge a complaint against the driver of auto number yada yada for harassment?”
Eehh?? Hello? Ehhh?
Me: er... harassment complaint lodge pannanum!
2244 madam! Please calling 2244!
So I dial f**ing 2244 while the auto driver stands there to make sure I’m not shittin him.
Me: hello, na alwarpet la irruken. Harassment complaint lodge pannanum.
Someone at the other end : sir! Sir! Yaaro yedho solaranga! Sir!!
Sir: Hello? Ess?
Me: hello. harassment (fucking) complaint(fucking) lodge-
Sir: eeh? Wat?
I repeat myself for the hundredth time.
Sir: not area in.. ehhh.. our eehh…area madam. You call 622.
By this time, luckily for me, the auto guy is as pissed as I am, he shoves the money in my hand and walks off.
Fat load of help the police were!
As was the watchman at our college when an asshole autodriver with a limp lunged after us, gritting his teeth , after calling us something to do with the pubes that I dint get. I have never been more grateful for my 2 fat, yet healthy legs and his one and a half. We tore down the college looking like supreme dumbf***s while the guard stood there picking his nose.
And neither were the general population at satyam, when, because we apparently quoted a fare too low, the auto guy yells after us about our quote being the same price as “one condom, you know?”.
The f***ers WILL choose Monday mornings when you have’nt slept the night before to flirt and say
“padikiringla
and when that doesn’t evoke a response “madam neenga romba simple-a irrukinga”
what he meant by simple, I will never know.
F***ing retards! Its absolutely ALL I can take. I’m going to throw a tantrum for the first time since I was five and get me a car. I DO NOT need to deal with these assholes every day of my life. I have enough to deal with already!
End of rant.
Peeps.
